You ask them what they need.
You thought it was challenging trying to figure out what you need, above? Try asking someone in distress what they need — No, don’t.
5. Level-UP / Go Deeper
The thing is, when we are in distress, we aren’t in a trusting, calm place where we can make great decisions about what we need.
So — first, to find out what we need, what we really, really need, we need to practice self regulation, co-regulation.
- 5 deep breaths, breathing together
- gargling, singing, chanting
- dancing, walking, running
Then, when you’re quiet and calm, and there is trust, ask. And grow together.